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He could not sow the seeds of love in the field of newly bride. About her husband, she says : "My husband was immersed in his office-work, and after worth. There was the dinner, fo '.lowed by sex. Where was :herc any time left for him to want to see the sea ?"14 Here, 'sea' stands for her feminine self. Here, her sexual self feels like a bird caught in spring which tries to fly-away but can not. Her feminine self is filled with tragic vision and melancholy. Her life, even her feminine identity, becomes a mere toy in the hands of her husband. As Hotense Allart opines: "I am delighted to have really learnt what a woman's fate is, for I talked about it before and was not married now, I do know"15 Instead of getting happiness in marriage Kamla Das gets in it a heap of tension and despair an even danger to her existence. She tells in - My Story- that she suffered a nervous break down as a neglected wife. She was kept closed into a room where her poetic self as well as her feminine identity got suffocation. About this cruelty against female H.M Parsley opines: "All agree in recognizing the fact that females exist in the human species, to day as always they make up about one half of humanity. And yet we are told that femininity is in danger, we are exhorted, to be women, remain women, become women..."16 She remembers the poem 'My Grandmother's House' by and lars;e its comforts,kids supra shoes. She writes: "The house withdrew into silence, snakes moved among books I was Then two young To read, and my blood turned Cold like the moon. How often I think of going There ............ "17 The grand mother's house is a symbol of security and protection which is now missing in her married life. Even the 'darkness' of this house keeps security for her feminine identity. She wants this darkness to be present in her married home. Her love-longing psyche expresses the feelings of fustration. Her love-self calls her husband darling, far sometime, out of love, she forgets the boredom of her frustrated life.
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